Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Jesus Called: He Wants His Religion Back.

I get to the office this morning and there's a message from my boss: he's going horseback riding and he'll be in sometime after noon. I was irritated; I wanted to have breakfast with my sister before she heads back to California, and I should otherwise be in bed with this hellacious cold... but nooooo...

~~

I was startled to read in Monday's Repulsive that Father Dale Fushek is once more feeding his ego. He has been forbidden to hold any services or do any kind of ministry in light of the allegations and his administrative suspension. The first glaring error in the article is that Fushek is not a "former priest"; he is still a priest at the present time, and one in deep trouble at that. The phone lines to Rome must be burning up.

From the article: "He said he's a preacher and he wants to preach." To me, that translates into "I'm in it for me, and I'll do what I want." BZZZZZZT, wrong answer! This is the same guy who went in with a former priest--Mark Dippre, former pastor of Our Lady of Mount Carmel, who dumped the priesthood and married the woman he'd been boinking for awhile--and did another similar service before Thanksgiving.

The fact that he takes his vows and vocation so lightly is sad. What happened to obedience? What about humility? From a forum I read, "Secular priests are bound by an implicit vow of chastity that results from taking orders. Their obligation to obey the bishop does not come from a vow, but from Canon Law." I'm thinking that Fushek wasn't paying attention and took a vow of disobedience. He's certainly ignored any direction from Bishop Olmsted and Msgr. Adamson. I also believe he's mistaken the terms career and vocation. You don't "quit" the priesthood and do a career change. It's not corporate America.

It's strange--once he was beyond the protection of Bp. O'Brien, his star fell fast.

Fr. Mike Manning, SVD, on one of his Q&A pages, stated: "A priest's obedience to a bishop's difficult order catches our attention when we find ourselves enmeshed in an overly selfish understanding of freedom. The prophetic call of the priesthood speaks of an ideal. It is an attempt to imitate Christ in a radical way." Fushek was and is not living up to this ideal, even if you ignore the legal woes he has.

I'm not one to say this often, but Fushek is listening to the devil these days, thinking he doesn't need to obey, doesn't need to look within himself and see the flaws, causes and effects of his actions, and he's obviously listening to his ego, rather than remember the promises he made to God in shepherding His flock.

I was going to continue the commentary with anecdotes and opinions, but in the end I know I shouldn't--I'll just pray that he sees the errors of his ways and humbles himself before God and asks his forgiveness for making a sham out of his vows.

One last thought, though, from the end of the article: " 'If I have to leave the church for him, I'll do it' Gergosian said."

Wow. Just.... wow. Cult of personality, anyone? You're following the wrong man, sir. The one you should be following is the Man on the Cross.

~~

This leads me to something that has bothered me for awhile. In candidates' formation recently, one of the formation directors (we have it co-chaired) keeps harping on the decisions made by Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger, both before and after his election to the papacy. One he doesn't like at all was the declaration of the primacy of Catholicism. Well, duh--even if you're not a theologian, of course we believe that we are the One True Faith. Why else would we be here? Besides, he's made a statement on a matter of faith; shush.

And I know Franciscanism embraces ecumenism, which is great and fine--I'm good with that, and have always lived my life thusly; in fact, I'm fascinated by the rites and rituals of other religions. However, I have found in my two and a half years here that we Franciscans are extremely tolerant of any other religion on earth, but there's a thread of distrust and dislike for a certain section of the Catholic community, if some don't just outright despise them.

In fact, this past spring, I was to cover a subtopic of Catch Me a Rainbow Too that was titled, "Fundamentalism". The entire section was a backhanded slap in the face against anyone who observes or even likes the Tridentine Rite, and I was going to gently call the writer on it and encourage dialogue within the group. I personally find this stance highly hypocritical of the SFO--we embrace those with conflicting beliefs but shun those within our own fold? My presentation on that section, however, got hijacked by the then-director, who proceeded to go off on anything and anyone who even liked the Mass and anything that came to pass prior to Vatican II. I was shocked at the vitriol and vehemence (an attitude mirrored by the aforementioned current co-chair). I was disillusioned and sad, and my talk got derailed so badly that I saw no point in trying further.

From this incident nearly ten months ago, a burgeoning depressive funk has been born on my part where it came to the SFO, compounded by various other things within the functions and activities of my individual fraternity. I was momentarily uplifted by the retreat, but more and more I have felt that because I lean towards the traditional end of the spectrum that I may not fit into the scope and mission of the SFO, because of it's liberal, and sometimes mind-blowing outright disobedient, leanings within the Church.

I have been told twice, in two separate meetings, that if I do not "conform" to certain things, that if I don't pattern myself on other candidates' path, that I will "not be recommended to move forward." I find the use of pressure re: conformity odd in light of the fact that Francesco Bernadone was the greatest non-conformist in the Church, yet he succeeded in weaving his new way of thought within the fabric of the Catholic faith, remaining obedient, and getting the message across that Catholicism is not a passive religion--something that needs to be preached today as it was 800 years ago.

There's a few problems with these rocks being flung at my head: most of the people in fraternity are old enough to be my parents, and in some cases, grandparents; I am the youngest by at least five years; I am at a totally different place in my life than the fellow candidates I'm being prodded into "conformity"; and I will not be goaded into being disobedient and/or flouting the Church's stances--don't get my wrong, I'm not a blind follower by any means (God gave us brains, after all), but even Francis on his deathbed exhorted his flock to be true to the Roman Church, and that is what I intend to do.

From Testament of the Holy Father St Francis:

...After that the Lord gave me, and gives me, so much faith in priests who live according to the form of the holy Roman Church...

...And we ought to honor and venerate all theologians and those who minister to us the most holy Divine Words as those who minister to us spirit and life... (et tu, Ratzinger?)

...And I caused it to be written in few words and simply, and the Lord Pope confirmed it for me...

...I, little Brother Francis, make for you, my blessed brothers, in order that we may observe in a more Catholic way the Rule which we have promised to the Lord...

From St. Bonaventure’s Major Life of St. Francis:

...He spoke of patience and poverty and of being faithful to the Holy Roman Church, giving precedence to the Holy Gospels before all else... (emphasis mine)

Skepticism, indifference, sadness, pressure, grief, apathy, feelings of exile and exclusion... I'm torn between composing a resignation letter to my minister and sticking it out to be a voice of reason in a mad world.

I don't know what to do.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

MERRY CHRISTMAS 2007

May the flawless joy of the Infant Jesus light your hearts.

Wishing you peace and joy.

Friday, December 07, 2007

The Best "Fw:Fwd:Fw:" in a Loooong Time

In my email today, I got one of those chain emails that you're supposed to send to everyone. I loved the pics of the metal Crucifixion art in Amarillo... I don't have time to repost the pics, but I can cut and past what was at the end.


The Greatest Man in History:
Jesus had no servants, yet they called Him Master.
Had no degree, yet they called Him Teacher.
Had no medicines, yet they called Him Healer.
He had no army, yet kings feared Him..
He won no military battles, yet He conquered the world.
He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him.
He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today.

Monday, November 05, 2007

What Makes It All Worthwhile

The meeting went phenomenally well. It was easy, seamless, and jovial--certainly not the stress-fest we thought it would be. The Candidates' presentation--both first and second year--was a joy and was something that got everyone in a groove. Our regional minister and our regional spiritual director were in attendance for the pastoral and spiritual visit, and I had met our minister before a couple of times, and I'd remembered where I saw Br. D before: the regional day of recollection at San Xavier del Bac back in May, 2006--he was our tour guide.

Yesterday evening, we all received the most beautiful email from our minister. She and her husband are the original torch bearers of the dream, and have rallied around them several top-notch people that have made the dream so close to reality. The email is so beautifully and prayerfully written that I think it's worth sharing. This is what she wrote:

Subject: Graces

You are a grace.

We have received many blessings and many of God's graces these past six-seven years as we have been growing our Franciscan community. I hope each one of you know that God put us together for many purposes - it is not, nor was it, by chance. You have been chosen.

The ongoing formation presentation was a testament to the power of sharing with one another, being vulnerable, letting go, and building up the Body of Christ. What joyfulness you brought to today's meeting and to the fraternity throughout its journey in becoming an established fraternity. God has given us you! You are a grace.

For the Council members and Commission and Committee chairs and members who unceasingly serve others, including one another and our fraternity and beyond, you, too, are graces.

Our fraternal and pastoral visit was another grace given freely today. Each of you helped to make our forming community into an emerging fraternity. Thank you for sharing the graces that God has given you with Saint Clare Emerging Fraternity so it can continue to grow in many ways and into an established fraternity. Special thanks to P__ B____ who patiently and skillfully took our reports and data and assembled them into a tidy and detailed notebook that is easy to follow and as R__ stated, sets the standard for all other fraternities regarding business affairs.

It appears that the Region at its February 2008 meeting will include on its agenda a recommendation to approve Saint Clare for establishment of a full fraternity. Your work you have done, through praying, persevering, letting go, willingness to share your talents, offering your skills, laughing, crying, all for the glory of God is a grace! We are called to serve as Franciscans. Thank you for embracing our commitment to serve. Celebrate!

Peace and joy.


I have had many struggles in the last couple of years, especially in the last year or so. Some of them have come directly from the politics inherent in any organization; some of them are just the Dark One working his mischief. I have a long way to go; however, I would never have gone as far as I have without our Minister, her husband (who is our co-formation director as of the last election), my current sponsor (the other co-director), and the incredible circle of women who comprise the current crop of Candidates, both first and second year.

After this moving weekend, I am re-energized and ready to tackle my several more months of candidacy. There is no doubt in my mind after this weekend that I am where I am supposed to be.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Musings and Other Stuff

The Emerging Fraternity is getting it's Pastoral Visit this weekend. We are praying that we get the approval to become a full-fledged fraternity. I was going to say "hope against hope" instead of prayer because it is rare, if not unheard of, that an E. F. becomes a full-fledged fraternity after the first pastoral visit, not because I don't think we're not prepared or ready to become one. In fact, I think we're unusually prepared and ahead of the game, and are blessed with some phenomenal people to make the E.F. as strong as it is. But from all accounts for an E.F. to become a full fraternity at the first pastoral visit is pretty much unheard of. But we can certainly all pray for it!

It has been wacky and weird and very busy. The weirdest is the most recent--reconnecting with an ex-boyfriend from 15 years ago. Right now it's a lot of "OMG LOL What have you been doing all these years!!eleventyone!!1!1!!1!" If he gets into that breakup from when we were pretty much kids, I'm going to say "B, this was 15 years ago, I'm so past it!" It remains to be seen if I have a friend on the other end of the line. :)

The semester is racing to its close and I have an impossible paper for one class that has nothing to do with the content of the class--it actually has to do more with a class that is being offered next semester by another instructor. Research papers do not scare me; I can write them in my sleep. But the content the instructor wants is unfamiliar to me and I'm skeptical that I can write something I know next to nothing about. I have pulled magic out of my butt before, soo....

It is the Feast of All Saints, which marks November. November means the beginning of the holiday season, which is something I have mixed feelings about. I'm not really sure what I'm going to do, and I suspect the back of my mind is made up: I'm thinking of making the executive decision to decline any events for my side of the family. After last year's fiasco, and other crap in the interim, I'm pretty much done. It's going to hurt Dad, but I'll talk with him first before I make any firm decision.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Stuff and Nonsense

1) Um, yeah. About that last post. Thanks a lot, Tom. See my butt? Kiss it, baby. Kiss it publicly. To be fair, the 'Boys have a long way to go... but damn, Tom...

2) We (fraternity) went on retreat a couple of weeks ago--won't say where, won't say who was the retreat master--and let's just say it blew chunks. I can read from articles. I can read from 10 year old notes. I can create a retreat that manages time better than that. I can create a retreat that is more profound and less droll. And that's sad, considering that I don't know squat about giving retreats.

Oooo, wasted time, let me get started. The first night? Sign in at 5:00, a mediocre dinner at 6:30, and the first talk started at 8:30. How long did the talk go? 10 minutes. 10 freaking minutes, then "Good night." Eh?

Second day: I skipped breakfast and enjoyed my time with TJ, but it was at 7. The first talk was at 9:30, and lasted 20 minutes; hour break. Second talk? 25 minutes, followed by and hour break, then lunch, then another hour and a half before the next talk. Of course, we used some of this time for our fraternity meeting, which was more poor time management, but that's the bane of any club or organization. Anyway--we had almost four hours of downtime. The worst part? The 25 minute talk in the afternoon was flat-out hawking the books. When it was announced that the evening session would be book signing, I fled... and I wasn't the only one. I returned on Sunday morning around 9 for the morning talk... nobody stayed past it although there was Mass and then lunch provided.

Don't get me wrong--there were some gems in the rough, but they were buried deeply. I'm glad we candidates only have to give a 20 minute talk for the next meeting. I'll post a little later on some tidbits.

I don't appreciate the weekend being used for the retreat master's book hawking and signing. I don't appreciate having not only everyone's time wasted, but the money that we attendees and the Fraternity shelled out to attend it. It was expensive, and I don't think we got our money's worth.

3) Work is good but frustrating, school the same, and my knee is better every day. I didn't tear the ligament again, but I sprained it good.

4) Sibs are in crisis mode. I'm ignoring them.

5) Pray for some friends of mine who have left the traditionalist (CMRI!!) sect and come home to the fold. Christ in His mercy and wisdom has opened their eyes. The wife's family is hard-core traditionalists and the road ahead is going to be rough.

Peace! More later.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

An Open Letter To Tom Brady

Thomas E. Brady, Jr.
New England Patriots
One Patriot Place
Foxborough, MA

Dear Tom:

Heya there, how you been? Things are finally cooling down here in this God-forsaken desert--60s in the morning, mid-90s in the afternoon. It's really like the North Pole... but it's a relative comparison when I remember that you're on the East Coast. You would probably wither and die out here.

Writing this, it reminds me: I need to call your Aunt Tinker. We still need to have tea. She's great, isn't she? She's the cousin, other than her and my mutual cousin Melinda (on our fathers' side), that I'm closest to. She was so proud of you that she actually said, "You remember Phil, my ex-husband...?" Well, they always say you're three degrees from someone famous, and for me, that makes two. How cool is that?

(As an aside, I like to tell people "Tom Brady's my cousin... by marriage... And no, I've never met him, why do you ask?" But hey, who's really counting? I'm sure you can appreciate my attempts, weak as they are... but nobody can say I'm lying! heh)

Anyway, as to the reason I'm interrupting your preparations...

Much hot air has been given to the game this weekend. I try not to read anything, listen to the radio, or watch any television, because holy cow they were wrong about the Cowboys on Monday, weren't they? I think only ESPN warned that it could be a trap game, and I really appreciated their honesty. As devout as a fan I am, I was disheartened by the end of the third quarter and stopped watching. I had to go to Fark later that evening to find that oh my blessed Lord they won, they won, they pulled it out of thin air, and I about fainted. But hey, that's classic Cowboys football, and you can hardly fault Tony for channeling Roger Staubach--quite the trick, eh? Brilliant (I'm amazed that he can have 5 INTS and still manage 300+ yards passing... just.. WOW). I just hope he doesn't get into the habit. I don't think I could take it.

Now listen, I have a favor to ask: do you think you can hold off on the massacre on my 'Boys this weekend? You can go on a rampage on the other teams for the rest of the season, and even in the Super Bowl... but ya think your considerable talents can take a vacation for about two hours on Sunday? I'm really enjoying the delusion that the 'Boys can go undefeated all through the season. So would you mind terribly?

Believe me, Tom, it's not a lack of faith in the talent on my team. However, they are young and untested, although Tony is proving he can pull a win out of his ass (almost literally), and the rookie, Nick, has shown he's already a veteran and has the cojones to win. Well, hell, the team has shown they can hold it together despite their QB fouling up beyond comprehension. And, you know, I have a bit of admiration for the coach, too--he's done a phenomenal job, including getting Bigmouth to shut the hell up.

So, Tom, thanks in advance for the favor. Peace!

With love
from your Cousin

Wednesday, October 03, 2007




Amen.

It's been insane. I'm also considering a drastic move, but I need to think about it some more.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

And You Thought American Bishops Were Bad

I came across this article on MSN today. A Dutch bishop suggests the following:

"Allah is a very beautiful word for God. Shouldn't we all say that from now on we will name God Allah? ... What does God care what we call him? It is our problem."

Is this guy on crack?

I'll comment more later. Gotta go to school.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Moseying Along

It's been quiet but it's been busy. My cousin, who has returned from Iraq, will be coming through town this next weekend. I haven't seen her since my wedding five years ago.

School ramps back up next week, catechism at the end of the month, St Vincent de Paul, and all that stuff.

I'm going to do something else, too: I am going to take tap lessons. Always a fan of Gene Kelly, I was watching his clips on YouTube. I asked myself, "why not?" and then I grumbled to myself: I should have done this when I was in the Forest Service, with all that downtime during the winters... sheesh, I lost all that time. So, I'm taking a class offered by the city. It will be as Bonnie Franklin titled her tap tape back in the 80's: I hate to exercise, but I love to tap. It will also be a help, I think, with my knees, help to build the muscle back in my legs so that I continue to stave off knee problems.

Go me!

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Cruising the Intertubes

I've gotten back into my habit of cruising several excellent blogs, including the perennial favorites of Curt Jester, Fr. Z's What Does the Prayer Really Say?, Roman Catholic Blog, and Whispers in the Loggia.

Here is a sampling of my recent favorite posts:

Deep Six the Sixties

Dissenting Cadre Quiz and PLRC-SAAM infection spreading???

California Catholic on the Motu Proprio

Letter-writers defend Fighting Father Malloy

No News

A satirical moving tribute to Marty Haugen, Pastoral Musician of the Year
Side Note: gads, and the plethora of his music I used to sing... you can almost make his music respectable when you have the organ accompaniment. Lil and David worked hard to obliterate the Kumbaya flavor of his music and did a fine job of it. The guy isn't even Catholic, for heaven's sake!

A Quaker on Defective Churches and "Subsistit In"

While We're All Busy Being Offended...

So I keep pretty busy with my reading. After a thorough confession (thank you Fr. David from the Fathers of Mercy, an Order of which I am a big fan--thank you, Fr. Hoorman for being so comfortable with your orthodoxy that you invite them back again and again), I'm back at Mass and back in the groove.

Formation starts again next month, and I finally have an active mentor. The formation duo has added texts to now more fully supplement "Catch Me a Rainbow Too": "To Live As Francis Lived," "Francis: The Journey and the Dream," and the "Secular Franciscan Companion."

I have a prayer request: please pray for Bernadette, the formation director of the St Francis Fraternity in Phoenix, and her family. Her son-in-law was tragically killed after one of our monsoon storms.

Peace.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Letting Others Do The Talking

By now there's a billion running commentaries on the settlement in the LA Archdiocese. I can't say it any better than this.

My only wry thoughts are these: how is Mahony going to keep paying for that horror of a cathedral he built? And what parishes and other diocesan properties are going to be shut down and the land sold so they can pay this off?*

That's my cranky thought for the day. It's a sad day.







_________________________________________________________________
* One blog I read suggested he start by selling off that ugly joke of a building... not a bad idea

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Straight From A Horse's Mouth

I received an email from a SSPX friend of mine as to why their priests have their panties in a bunch; she clarified the simple issue:

Yes, the SPX group is still not happy. The reason is because traditional priests are being required to say the V2 mass periodically in order to be recognized by Rome . They have to promote V2 in their sermons and their education. The priests cannot say the Traditional Latin Mass exclusively. Since SPX does not agree with V2 and it’s teachings, they are not happy that they would be required to promote V2 and periodically have to say the new Mass. So we’re getting closer, but we’re not all the way there yet. If the Pope would just let us say the Mass in the Traditional Rite, then we would be okay with it for now.

Anyway… so that’s the situation. We’ve been getting sermons about it because the priests are not happy about how it turned out. But we haven’t given up hope yet.


If you take the traditionalist/RadTrad position, this makes perfect sense. But if you're a traditionalist with an eye to reconciling with Rome, you have to make some concessions. Benedict is no fool--he won't dispose of V-II out of hand, nor should he. V-II was a legitimate Council and they will just have to accept that. It's not going away.

You can't have it both ways, folks.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING

Oh dear Lord in heaven... you would think that the Apocalypse has come according to the media and various internet sites. I love some of the headlines:

Other Christian Denominations Aren't True Churches, Pope Says

Vatican Stresses Inferiority Of Protestants, which clicks to the headline Vatican: Non-Catholics 'wounded' by not recognizing pope (stupid CNN)

Pope: Other Christian Denominations Not True Churches (same AP release as above)

And just who are World Alliance of Reformed Churches to cry and moan? It'd mean more if it came from the Archbishop of Canterbury or someone like that. What do they care, especially an organization that is "deeply rooted in the Reformation heritage"? Certainly the Catholic Church isn't going to agree with Reformation discussion topics. It's just like the media to latch on to something with little credibility on the subject.

Good and sweet baby Jeebus, just RTFA (as the say rather colorfully on Fark)! Just Read It! The document states flatly that "The Second Vatican Council neither changed nor intended to change this doctrine, rather it developed, deepened and more fully explained it." There is nothing really new in this document, just clarifications and some hard truths: the Protestants do not enjoy Apostolic succession as of the years between 1517 and 1648; as big of a mistake that Martin Luther made, he's probably turning in his grave at the umpteen thousand splinters of the Protestant movement; no, the Orthodoxies can't have it, not theirs (although there is apostolic succession there, they do not prescribe to the primacy of Rome).

Notice this section: "It is possible, according to Catholic doctrine, to affirm correctly that the Church of Christ is present and operative in the churches and ecclesial Communities not yet fully in communion with the Catholic Church, on account of the elements of sanctification and truth that are present in them.[9] Nevertheless, the word "subsists" can only be attributed to the Catholic Church alone precisely because it refers to the mark of unity that we profess in the symbols of the faith (I believe... in the "one" Church); and this "one" Church subsists in the Catholic Church,[10] " The underlining is mine. Every news outlet and every outraged party has totally ignored this quiet little caveat.

They have also ignored this, from the Third Question: ""It follows that these separated churches and Communities, though we believe they suffer from defects, are deprived neither of significance nor importance in the mystery of salvation. In fact the Spirit of Christ has not refrained from using them as instruments of salvation, whose value derives from that fullness of grace and of truth which has been entrusted to the Catholic Church"[12]." Hmmm?

In terms of the Orthodoxies: " 'Because these Churches, although separated, have true sacraments and above all – because of the apostolic succession – the priesthood and the Eucharist, by means of which they remain linked to us by very close bonds"[13], they merit the title of "particular or local Churches"[14], and are called sister Churches of the particular Catholic Churches[15]. Is this really so hard to read and absorb?

One comment on a blog made me laugh: "Comedians around the world must envy the Roman Catholic Church's charism of being able to create shock without needing to invent new material."

There are good commentaries here and here. Hunt through the blogosphere for more.
~~~~~~
Here are what people are saying on various forums. Sadly, it's the orgy of misinformation that leads to backward and backstabbing comments like this (my commentary in red):

In America, and I can't speak for other countries, we Catholics don't pay a whole ton of attention to what the pope says. Cafeteria Catholic extraordinaire!!

go molest an altar boy boy cross dressing freak Um?

Aww, give the guy a break. He reached the top just as the whole charade is crumbling. Catholics are bailing in droves, church assets are being sold to pay off homo child rape lawsuits and guys like Dawkins and Hitchens keep bringing up pesky fundamentals flaws in the dogma. He's just trying to hold on to his fancy gold and jewelry, $500 Prada shoes, smokey purse, tax free real estate and giant opulent churches.. You know, all the things Jesus advocated. (what crack is he on????)


all Catholicism has ever given me is an all-encompassing guilt in ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING I DO! I even get guilty crossing the road its that bad... I suspect that there is something more to this than the Catholic Church. The Guilt Express went out of service forty years ago, honey.

I'm a mellow Presbyterian, so here is my response to the Pope: Meh. It's exactly that "meh" that's causing strife in your brand of Protestantism as well as in the Episcopal.

I'm ashamed of my Pope. So, so ashamed. (oh no, this one believed the media! this one didn't go to the Vatican website and read it for themselves!)

I'm sorry but I don't listen to a buncha farkwads that spend all the money that goes to "charity" on shiney golden egg things and 100 foot Jeezuz statues. Not to mention they contradict or change thier own "gospel" whenever it inconviences them. The ignorance in this post is staggering.

Silly Catholics...shut up and worship your idols like good little heathens. More ignorance.

Apparently the Pope needs a Bible lesson. I think he's forgotten some parts of it... specifically that Christ's death provided a means of salvation so that we couldn't have to confess our sins to some priest in a closet in order to be forgiven. Eternal forgiveness is God's to give, not some man wearing a funny black suit. Sounds like this person did some self-absolving. Does this mean you can do anything because God will certainly forgive in the end? Interesting.

The only true church, eh? There are several reasons why it's not:The Crusades/The Inquasition/Burning people at the stake for owning a bible/Indulgances/Purgatory/Worship of the Saints/Use of idols/Very corrupt Popes of the past/The fact that the church was created by a Roman emporer so that he could unify his nation/ making all the pagans "Christians" too.The list goes on after that. I don't think that there is another religion, that calls itself Christian, that bears less resemblance to the the Christianity described in the Bible. This one has read too much of The DaVinci Code. Fiction, honey, fiction. And where's Fr. Z when I need snappy commentary?

It has already been said, but it is worth saying again, I suspect that most Catholics (myself included) do not approve of that kind of statement from the Pope. You do not know your Faith, you do not know your Catechism, and moreover you need to be reeducated, and then slapped with a missal. Do not assume to speak for all Catholics. Besides, if you didn't believe that the Roman Catholic Church was the path to salvation, why do you call yourself Catholic and then turn around and disavow it?

fark you, you farking Nazi. We all go to hell, but you, who helped push Jews into ovens get a free pass? Really? (this one made me so sad)

Brilliant. Years of ecumenical outreach down the drain. The majority of the Catholic and Protestant membership would like more unity, so PopeyMcPoperson says something incredibly divisive. Well done, Cardinals, you elected a real winner this time. You are a moron.

Pope Benedict is like the George W Bush of Catholicism. (Lord, forgive them...)

Wow. The church of pedophilia? Interesting. I'll... pray for you.

First and foremost, the Pope is the emperor of the Roman Empire, which today only extends as far as the walls of the Vatican. He's just shoring up his base by pandering to the fanatics. (Oh--My--Word!!)

One poster: Dear Pope Benny,Thanks for completely farking up the work of your predecessor. Please [drop dead]. Sincerely, The World (Former Catholic)
Subsequent poster: actually most people of the world care less what the pope says or does. He has no value or significance.
Then how come the entire world was tuned in at JPII's death and watched for the smoke for his predecessor? How come everyone knows who the Pope is? Why do heads of state come to visit? Insignificant, my shiny silver St Charles Borromeo medallion!

So the Catholic church has announced that only their religion is the correct one. So they are fundamentalists officially now. Fundamentalism is a problem around the world, a plague on humanity. False Logic. You poor, uneducated, generalizing, puffed up fool.

Admitting up front that I didnt read the other comments.....This is yet another attempt to scare ex-catholics back in to the Catholic church. Their membership has been bleeding for quite awhile now while other denominations have gained. (again, the crack this person's on?)

He's going to take catholicism back to the 1920s, and the only thing it's going to do is make people hate catholics more. More poorly thought out logic.

*sigh* Pope Benny keeps this shiat up and that whole prophecy about him being the second to last pope may come true. Hey, Madam Sophia is on the phone. She predicts that you might make a false and silly statement today... oh wait.

JESUS CHRIST WASN'T CATHOLIC! Well, no; he was a renegade Jew who founded a Church upon Simon Peter, who thence went to Rome and established the Church as we know it there. Read your history.

I think he was chosen because he's old and batshit insane. Then, like with our presidential election, the next pope will be more moderate and perhaps a bit younger. Benny is going to stroke out soon after they find the replacement that they actually want to have around for a while... People are amazing, aren't they?

The Pope is a figurehead, who is meaningless in purpose and existence. He should resign, or die. (nice... must be a real charmer in life. Incidentally, that's generally how Popes exit their pontificate. Now, look at a similar post above and that's how I feel about your hot air.)

From Hilter Youth to Pope...He has come a long way. A plague upon thee for your impertinence and your ignorance.

John Paul II tried not to quack it too much, but the fact is that Benedict XVI lacks the silver tongue of his predecessor. John Paul shared almost all of Benedict's opinions; he simply made it a point of trying not to alienate over four billion people. What a shame. Though there is truth in the first sentence, any Catholic who knows their stuff isn't going to be in a huff about this media-fed tempest in a teapot.

Apparently you really need some priests banging little boys in the *** to really qualify as the top church. Oh, and cover it up as well. Then you really have it right. fark the Pope. What nerve he has to put his organization with all the recent legal problems in any place higher than another church. I hate generalized statements.

In all seriousness, how does the Catholic Church support their own apostolic succession? If one were to go by the succession of Popes, one finds Popes that were not just unholy but murderous, incestuous drunkards that threw orgies and raised money by selling indulgences. I'm speechless. Just... speechless.

I love God, I love Jesus, but the Church needs to go [drop dead] with THIS douchebag of a Pope. Support your statement, child. Tell me why he's a douchebag again? Methinks you are speaking more of yourself than Papa here. See entries in comebacks under rubber, glue.

~~~
And you know that the people who post this garbage proclaim peace, tolerance and unity in other posts. But the Catholic Church and the Catholics? Sound the hunting horn and let the games begin.

This is what the ignorant and the haters say. Wow. So sad.

The minority opinion speaketh:

Wow... I had no idea so many self appointed "intellectuals" had such a poor understanding of Catholicism. It's interesting to see how many people listen to popular media rather than doing the research of church history themselves. If they did... they wouldn't have said some of the things they did. This person got hounded and will probably never return to that particular forum. This is a dead-on statement.

Catholics believe they are a distinct religion with its own beliefs and vehicle to salvation. Their is nothing unusual or controversial about this when compared to centuries of Catholic teachings, everything ratty-boy said is completely consistent with what Catholics are supposed to believe. So go sit in the corner, you little media whorelets in training. You eat up everything the left wing talking heads feed you like its caviar and goose liver pate. I do not believe this poster is Catholic, but the point made is very valid in a rather shockingly funny way.

Now that Papa is off to his well deserved vacation, the hubbub might just die down, and the raging bigotry will subside for a little while.

Yes, I am praying for every single one of them tonight.

Monday, July 09, 2007

SUMMORUM PONTIFICUM IS HERE

It's here, the long awaited Motu Proprio that has been the buzz since Benedict XVI was elected. I have said several times that I view this as placing the Tridentine Rite in the place of honor next to the Novus Ordo, where it belongs. I guess I will never understand the fear with which it is treated by the extreme... progressives, I guess they like to be called... within the Church; but then I don't get liturgical dancing, crappy kumbaya music(or, more recently, the near-pop concerts), or the desecrations of altars and Liturgy that I've witnessed since I was a child.

Last week, a friend of my boss called, someone who I've talked Church shop with often. He was jubilant because he considers the then-impending release of Summorum Pontificum the beginning of the end of the Novus Ordo--"they're scared because they know it's over!" he exclaimed. I blinked in disbelief.

I told him that he was being naive; the Novus Ordo is now part of the fabric of the Church and it's never leaving. And, personally, since I am a child of the Novus Ordo era, it doesn't bother me in the least. It is all I have ever known, and have been fortunate to have found parishes that say the Mass in a respectful, excellent manner. However, I do believe that he's naive, and those who think like him, very much so; and that these 'progressives' who are freaked out about the return of the Latin Mass are acting much like Chicken Little. I wonder what they really fear.

And slowly but surely the directives to clean up the mess in the Novus Ordo is coming from the top. I understand there have been movements to clean up the translation, bring dignity back to the Liturgy, and quiet instructions to get the awful caterwalling that passes for music at Mass in many parishes back to respectful and appropriate music.

Can we have a directive squashing parishes that are afraid to proclaim they are Roman Catholic Churches? When I see "St Hopeless Catholic Faith Community" I get worried. Any church I hav been in that uses that moniker doesn't look a thing like a Catholic Church inside. One in particular took me 4 visits to find the tabernacle (hidden in a corner, encased in ugly wrought iron and topped with a single dark red lantern). Yes, scary. Be proud! This is a Roman Catholic Church!!

It should be interesting to see how this plays out. Stay tuned.

~~~~~~~~~~
Good breakdown and commentary here. Akin gives warning that he's using the unofficial translation, but I think that the general idea stands.

Rumor has it that the translation at the USCCB site is different than that of the Vatican's... one commenter on Jimmy's blog alluded to shenanigans. Let's take it easy, folks. One thing at a time.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Defending the Faith?

One of my evil pleasures is reading Fark.com. It is one of my favorite news sites/forums. However, for all the participants' tirades on inclusion and fairness, it is a bastion of intolerance in a lot of cases, especially when it comes to Catholicism. In this thread, I tried to reason it out with some of them. I think I lost. Here are some excerpts and my commentary.

Me: My faith is strong and impenetrable...
Gawdzila: I.e. blindly obstinate.

Why is it that, when someone has a solid faith in God, that they're blindly obstinate? People don't seem to understand that God transcends everything. I've said before that I don't buy off on *everything* the Church says, because I have a brain. I take responsibility for that though, and I'll probably have to have a wee chat with St. Peter at the end of my days. "See, Petey, it's like this..."

Me: And don't think that Law isn't doing his penance. ... And you can bet he's isolated. No contact with the world, no power as he had yielded, power that he loved and craved. You can bet that he is persona non grata. Not your idea or mine of "justice"...
Gawdzila: Exactly.

Later in the thread someone pointed out that Law didn't do the deed himself. I then replied later in the thread that Law is just as guilty and filthy as those he shielded. The Boston DA (a Catholic!) let this slide, big time, as did the Vatican. Worse punishment should be meted out. It just seems that people don't understand that there are punishments worse than Bubba in the jail cell to people who wielded certain power.

Persnickety (in response to another poster's snarky comment): What makes you think this is the Vatican's policy? Seems to me Law is the asshole who made the decision to move pedos around. If it happened in other dioceses, you go after the top dog there too. Again, why punish everyone when it is only a handful of morons who messed up?

I suspect Persnickety isn't Catholic, either, but he/she gets it. I had correlated that line of thought to teachers who get busted for dinking with the kids: the school doesn't get trashed, and neither do the offender's colleagues. Faulty logic, I suppose, but I never took philosophy and argument. It's no surprise I got reamed. Kiss me arse, I say.

Gawdzila, in response to Persnickety: Because the Vatican is aware of what is going on and they have the power to, at the very least, publicly demand that all responsible parties be kicked out of the church and allow legal proceedings to , continue against them. But they haven't, so they are complicit in allowing people like Law to continue doing what they are doing.

Do people understand how huge the Church is? The Vatican, while it has feelers everywhere, is not omniscient. In a church of this size, I imagine that it's very easy to play the coconut game. "What? I saw nothing." It wasn't until it became such a hot topic that the Vatican realized that there was a massive problem.

The Church may be guided by the Holy Spirit, but the men in red and white are still only human.

Is it me, or is the problem mostly in America?I have rarely run across such a problem in Europe or Australia... or maybe I'm just uninformed. Yeah, probably.

Gawdzila: If the church's leadership had simply excommunicated these priests for their actions and allowed the law to take its course, the church would not be the subject of such criticism.
Me: You'll not get an argument from me or any thinking Catholic on this statement. Right on the noggin.

Yes, my opponent was correct on this and I admitted it. This is what the Church *should* have done but didn't; irreparable damage was done to the Church's image. Bravo, Gawdzila.

Me: Sadly, some rotten apples spoil the whole shipment of barrels for a lot of you. It's hardly fair to lump the entire church because of a minority problem.

JestersTear: The problem is that it's the farking LEADERS OF THE CHURCH, dumbass!
***I never denied this, by the way. It was badly handled.

Pope John Paul, Pope Benedict, and their inner circle were aware of the events and condoned them through their actions and inaction.
***Condoned? Really? While I agree there was "inaction," the Church thinks in terms of eons, and not decades; things move slowly. It's getting there though.

Funny, JPII, the Pope of the Youth, John Paul the Great, is the evil character to this person. Interesting.

This wasn't "some rotten apples" on the fringe of the organization, this was the hierarchy of the organization comitting these crimes and / or discouraging the assaulted from filing police reports, and helping move the accused molestors to new crops of victims.

***Law would be considered "local" hierarchy, and, while a "leader," was not the Pope or part of the Cardinals' circle in Rome. Anyway, we all have to figure Law lied to the Vatican's face all that time and, in the absence of proof, Rome had to wait; that wait costs us. And it's true that the victims were intimidated by these foul persons: it happened here during O'Brien's tenure. It was wrong, so very wrong, but the work to fix the problem has been ignored by the people who will always insist that the Roman Catholic Church is evil--we'll never do anything right in their eyes.

This wasn't a recent happening. I'm 36, and I recall hearing about this crap happening when I was a child.
--"I recall hearing"? This person is relying on hearsay, which is not a good argument. His/her point is semi-valid, but hearing about it isn't the same as someone who *knows* someone who was traumatized.

Tell me, how is it that these people scream about child molestation (rightly!) but turn a blind eye to homosexuality?

I'm over it now: Seriously, corruption in Rome is nothing new. Anybody who is shocked by this simply hasn't paid attention for about 800 years or so. Not saying the Protestants have it all figured out either, just saying Rome has been corrupt for eons.

This is a person who still thinks the Borgias still run things. Wow.

Firelick: Why is it, that when someones picks on the heads of a religion, it automatically means that, that person is picking on the whole religion..?

Because they are, honey. Especially when it comes to the last acceptable form of bigotry, hating and trashing the Catholic Church.

Me: I'm sorry to see that anyone who has strong faith is automatically "blindly obstinate" in your book.
Gawdzilla: Well, the word "faith" in and of itself implies adherence to a belief, no matter the mountain of evidence against it or lack of evidence for it. That is pretty much the definition of 'blindly obstinate', isn't it?

No.
Blindly: without understanding, reservation, or objection
Obstinate: tenaciously unwilling or marked by tenacious unwillingness to yield
Therefore, no (see? I can has logic! heh). I understand what I am defending. I am not unwilling to discuss other views, as shown within the thread. I am a thinking animal. And as I believe in one God in light of the teachings of the holy Roman Catholic Church, I open myself to debate and flaming, I also will defend to the best of my abilities the tenets and reputation of my Faith and of my Church. My abilities may suck badly, but I will try until I'm physically and mentally unable to anymore.

Me: It makes my day when my religion comes up in otherwise pleasant conversations and I get a quip along the lines of 'you like child f*ckers, do you?' Not a misconception at all. Try being on the receiving end of such commentary and you'll get fed up too.
Gawdzila: Hm, I can see your point. I'd never make a comment like that, hell my grandma is still Catholic (though I admit that she is a pretty liberal one). I guess there are plenty of people who like to generalize on the basis of the actual molesters, but myself and many of the other non-mouth-breathers in this thread are more upset about the Church's response than the emergence of the problem in the first place.

See, this is a reasonable response. Dialogue is good. And, since this person had been reasonable, I wrote:

Me: Thanks for being considerate, Gawdzilla, even if you and I don't see eye to eye. Peace.

Which engendered the response from Gawdzilla:
Indeed. A few words uttered with reason and respect has more impact than an entire angry tirade. Peace, friend.

When you can argue and debate and end it on a respectful note, that's progress.

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Someone's knockin' at the door, somebody's ringin' the bell
Someone's knockin' at the door, somebody's ringin' the bell
Do me a favor, open the door, and let 'em in*

I'm not a McCartney fan, but this is the appropriate snip of music in my head right now. Tonight, I think, there is finally a light at the end of the tunnel, that dark tunnel that I wrote about before. It's just a pale, tiny glimmer, but a pinpoint of light nonetheless.

Not a lot has changed, really, but sometimes... there's just an instance where you have that nudge that you're doing the right thing, following the right path even though you lost the map.

Or, to continue the initial thought, someone was knocking and I opened the door.

Our fraternity had an impromptu pot luck meeting that was set up last week and took place earlier this evening (I just got home). A few months ago we had our elections, and we have a new formation director, with the person who came in second in voting an unofficial co-director (neither of whom is the previous director). They have revamped the formation syllabus and changed dates and times, we have new, more convenient times for formation and the meetings, and oh yeah, things are looking much better as a whole. Not so all-encompassing and day-wrecking (time-wise) as it was before. There are changes and shifts in meeting times and durations that are much different than we've had before, but I think they will be for the better, and everyone concerned will be happier overall.

One of the topics discussed was Mentors and Mentoring. I have had horrid luck with mentors. Mary was my first choice, someone I have always looked up to. But in the early fall last year, the Minister of her fraternity (not the one I'm in) had to have major surgery, and, as she was vice-minister, she foresaw problems with having time to give. So I go to Terri, another lovely woman who I love dearly, but we never could meet or talk, and she's had severe health issues. I was discouraged. I chose two ladies I trusted and looked up to, but they didn't pan out.

P, our new formation director, emailed me earlier this week, saying that he had just talked to Terri, and I would need a new mentor because of her poor health and our inability to get together and make it work. There was someone within our fraternity that I had grown to like and respect, and in recent months had started to quietly connect with. But I didn't have the nerve to go up and ask R. to mentor me, as I assumed he was swamped, already had a candidate or two to mentor, etc. etc.

Well, tonight became "assign those floaters who are in attendance to mentors" night. Not all of the candidates were assigned, especially if they weren't there. I think that the new council wants to start our new year cycle in August with all the pins in a row, which is wonderful. I think it's a grand idea and I watched and listened. My plight hadn't been discussed right off the bat, so I merely watched with interest, wondering if I could pull R. aside along with P. later in the evening and approach him on the subject. Unfortunately, all the tea I had drunk at dinner suddenly hit and I had to disappear for a moment. I come back, my name is called and I look up in surprise.

It kind of became an auction in reverse; instead of the price going up, people eligible were eliminated. R. was the 'reverse auctioneer,' if you will. Oh, Rosemary has two, Bill has one but is going on a South American mission in September, Sue is already mentoring and is swamped with Regional stuff, and thus it goes around the room. Suddenly, R. looks at me and says, "How about I be your mentor?"

I wanted to cheer, "HELL YEAH!" and dance a (badly executed) jig, but decorum decreed that I say in a demure tone, "That would be great!" I don't think I could keep the smile off my face or out of my eyes.

As it turns out, he isn't mentoring anyone at this point, so it's very fortuitous.

I am a scaredy cat. Mew!

~~~

This encouraging turn of events has my mind lighter... I know that's a badly constructed sentence, but it describes how I feel. I can actually think about picking up the website after months of indifference and lack of contributions from others, and getting back into the swing of things again. I haven't entirely shaken that disappointment that struck me so forcibly a few weeks ago.

We have a month off--we take every July meeting off for a break--and I think by the time that we start gearing back up in August I'll be ready to go. Hopefully, by then, the rest of my mind will be similarly at ease and I will be raring to go.

~~

Please pray for my fellow candidate who has a sister that's been in ICU for nine days; it's not looking good, and she and her family need all the prayers they can get. Thanks.

~~
Edited to Add: Her sister has passed away.
O Gentlest heart of Jesus, ever present in the Blessed Sacrament, ever consumed with burning love for the poor captive souls in Purgatory, have mercy on the soul of Thy departed servant. Be not severe in Thy judgment but let some drops of Thy Precious Blood fall upon the devouring flames, and do Thou O merciful Saviour send the angels to conduct her to a place of refreshment, light and peace. Amen.




__________________
*Paul McCartney/Wings, "Let 'Em In," 1976.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Crossing a Barren Desert

(Warning: lots and lots of venting, whining and crying. Stop now if you don't want to read).

For some time--and I'm not sure where it started--I've been in a sort of lethargy. I don't want to say crisis, because it's not a crisis, and certainly not a crisis of faith (thank God). But it's just... I don't know. Lethargy, apathy, bleh.


I haven't been to Mass regularly in a long time. Why? Not sure. I am unmotivated to do a lot of things. I need to confess that, as I can't partake until I've done so. But in the meantime, I'm struggling to figure out why I'm feeling this way. I haven't been in the mood to do much of anything Church-wise, whether it's serving at Mass, contacting the Catechism director, or the SFO--especially the SFO, where the whole presentation thing and how it was mostly dumped on me added to my despondent attitude.

I think a part of my issues have to do with all those years in crisis mode, always being on call at all times. Now that Mother is gone, the constant dread of when the shoe is going to drop has left a void that hasn't healed yet, and I haven't quite been able to drop that habitual tension. Yesterday's blue mood had more to do with my late sister: she would have been 46. Funny, as the years pass, I miss her more.

Mother's death opened a can of worms in the family dynamics aspect of life; to give an idea of how bad it's gotten, I do not want my siblings in my house--I can't host any event or holiday because of the blatant disrespect shown me, TJ, and my house. I finally learned that after all these years it's okay to say NO, that I am allowed to call my own shots within the family, to not allow myself to be their dumping ground as they blithely go on with their lives. Yet it makes me sad: it shouldn't have to be this way. Having learned to stand up for myself has exacted its own cost.

Add to this my procreation woes: five years of trying and nothing to show except for one terrifying ectopic. TJ said in January he would get tested, as he had for two years previously. They won't look at me until they look at him--he's easier to pinpoint/rule out. However, he has hangups about it. Granted, it's not a pleasant thing to look forward to, but I've personally endured worse. His is a one-shot deal... no pun intended, sorry... but mine will be invasive and embarrassing. Until he does his bit, I can't do mine. Anytime I bring it up he counters with things that have nothing to do with the price of beans in China. Very frustrating.

Not too long ago he said that we can't afford any assistance--yet we can find several grand for his jaw/teeth problems, several grand for the cat, and will spend thousands upon thousands eventually for him to pursue his dream: he wants to be a psychologist. This is great and fine, and I absolutely support him in his dream. But does it mean that I have to give up mine to be a parent? If it's a money issue as far as he's concerned, then adoption is out, as well as any other alternative. Lately, however, I've been wondering if he subconsciously doesn't want children. This issue has slowly overtaken my mind because I'm not getting any younger; once I was cynical about women crying about the "ticking clock." Now my own is ticking, with any chances of fulfilling my dream slowly vanishing, and it's a lonely place to be.

Also, I have recently had to face up that I have to let go of someone I care deeply for. This gentleman--let's call him Joe--was once a very close friend. We could talk forever: I'm the bookish one with all sorts of vast and odd knowledge, he is very smart and is world traveled thanks to several years in the military. We filled each others' gaps intellectually and it was so much fun just to talk about everything and nothing. Then, one day last September, Joe confessed he fell in love with me. Of course I had to say as kindly as I could (trying to hide my quiet little horror of being put into an impossible situation), no, sorry, there's nothing I can do, I said, but keep walking with me as my friend anyway. I know it can be done; wouldn't have suggested it if it wasn't possible. It has been a struggle, and I have prayed over it. A lot. But after the better part of this past year and his inability to deal with my reality, my love for TJ that has never changed, I have decided to let him and the dead friendship go. It's one of the hardest things I've ever done, but when all topics are now restricted, conversations become shorter and progressively more impersonal, there's nothing left for me to do. It's broken my heart. I tried. Tout fini.

So, yeah, I'm in that lonely deserted place with only myself to talk to. I've thought about talkig with Padrino, or with the pastor at my own parish, but from watching first hand I know they have so much on their hands already. I don't know what to do. Writing has helped.

Please forgive my long-windedness.

Monday, May 21, 2007

Discussion Topic: SFO Rule, Article 7: Interior Radical Change

(I have finally had time to condense the presentation we made for the May meeting. Sorry that I haven't had time to breathe... enjoy!)

The Candidates this year chose to present on Article 7 of the SFO Rule, which states:

United by their vocation as "brothers and sisters of penance" and motivated by the dynamic power of the gospel, let them conform their thoughts and deeds to those of Christ by means of that radical interior change which the gospel calls "conversion." Human frailty makes it necessary that this conversion be carried out daily.
On this road to renewal the sacrament of reconciliation is the privileged sign of the Father's mercy and the source of grace.

Initially, we set out to act as if we were going to define "Interior Radical Change " for a SFO dictionary or encyclopedia. That concept is something brought into discussion from the first time any curious person comes to an Inquiry session, and follows through Initiation, Candidacy, Profession, and all the rest of our lives as a Secular Franciscan. It was such a huge concept, a concept that everyone views differently. We sought to come to a common definition so that we could discuss the Article on common ground.

One group put it this way: pick it apart. "Interior," meaning from within; "radical," with its negative connotations in some aspects, think of it as extreme, over-the-top, unusual; and "change," transforming from one form to another. Therefore, Interior Radical Change could be defined as "an extreme transformation from within." Another group put it in a different way, incorporating the important concepts of community, the Gospel Life, and centering in Christ. The third group tied it into conversion. So, as common ground, the definition in regards to the SFO life would look something like this:

Interior Radical Change (n.): 1. A transformation from within a person when exposed to the Franciscan charism of centering on the Gospel life, following in Christ's footsteps, and living within and without the secular community. 2. A shift in perspective that elicits a spiritual and internal change in the way the person views the world and therefore acts in the Franciscan spirit.

With that in mind, we took the next step: is the concept of "conversion" exactly the same as "change"? Is it redundant? And is "conversion" the same as "radical interior change"? Conversion , it was discussed, is a higher form of change, and that conversion, daily conversion (which penance is a key part of), is the path to radical interior change.

Radical interior change is that phenomenon that, when lived and viewed through the Franciscan lens colored with the gospel life, changes one's entire outlook and how people react to situations. This was a good discussion that required little guidance, as it twisted and turned and brought newer and deeper understanding for all.

We read excerpts from Fr. Bernard Green's booklet "Transformation in Christ," as a segue from the previous topic and then bringing about the subjects in the second paragraph of the Article, in regards to Confession/Reconciliation, to which we steered to the subject of penance. Here are some excerpts:

The heart of the Gospel, then, is aimed at freeing us... so that we can give ourselves fully to all that brings an enhancement of human life... extend[ing] our horizons so as to natural life in a new light and as replete with higher potentialities through genuine community with one another (from Chapter 5).

This is the he part where we started the discussion regarding penance and repentance:

...[T]he New Testament understanding of repentance is quite different from our usual understanding of repentance as the way we win God's favor or which avoid His punishment...
"As portrayed in the New Testament, repentance is radically different, and to be transformed by the Gospel, we need to recognize this. In the Gospel, repentance is our response to the prior offer of grace, not the way in which we win that grace...


The difference between the Biblical understanding and our usual understanding of the term is that in the New Testament our repentance is made possible by the encounter of grace, and is thereby a gift that we appropriate, not something that we earn. It is not something which we can claim simply as our own achievement. It is not a matter of self-achievement but of receptivity of a gift (Chapter 6).

It stands to reason that the overall concept in the entire Article starts to a willingness to say "Yes" to God. Yes, to listening to that knocking on the door, yes to God's call. Yes to the Gospel life. Yes to change from within to see change from without. Yes to being one with Christ and walking with Him. Yes to the radical interior change that is necessary to stay on that path. Yes to admitting frailty, confessing sins that are part of being human, and to practicing that often to renew my path. Yes to God's invitation to grace so that I can be saved by Him.

Yes, I accept God's invitation to explore my faith.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Personal to BrBearSFO:

I can't access your profile... drop me a note at clarispraeclara@gmail.com

Thanks!
Lisa
I love late night bombshells

I checked my email before heading to bed last night and this is what I read:

"...S has called it quits on me and I am devastated... he’s gonna be moving away from [their daughter] and I very soon. He’ll be moving... once he’s discharged from the military on a medical basis. He’s had much stress with not knowing what’s going on with his health and career that I don’t think he’s making this decision based upon just us... Love is just not enough sometimes, I guess… [...] He’s pretty set in his decision though and the he wants me to start the paperwork for divorce while he’s away. I am just so torn about this… I hope that I didn’t unload on you too much."

I sat there stunned. My dear friend D is so sweet and this has obviously left her stunned, and from what else I read in this email this came out of left field. This was the pair that had fallen in love instantaneously, were so sweet and perfect together, the birth of their baby daughter the event of the year. S had pontificated before and after they were married about how he'll never abandon his family as his was, have the dysfunctional family his was, how he'll make sure that D and their daughter will want for nothing, that D was the sunshine of his life and he was so devoted to her. And he was, and everything was beautiful. I have to wonder what the medical issue is--he was fine last time I heard, so I wonder if it was something sudden because he was happy and doing well in the Air Force. There was no warning. Something is going on here.

I told TJ and he was astonished as well. He really liked S, had good vibes about him, and enjoyed his company. So it's not just me thinking that S had come across as true-blue and all that. He, too, thinks there's something else going on. Not cheating, because that's not the vibe I'm getting. Something less superficial, methinks.

So as soon as D gets back from out of town, I'll meet up with her and the first thing I'm going to do is give her a big hug, and I suspect that she'll crack and cry uncontrollably. The poor girl.

As my brain was full after reading this, I didn't get to sleep until midnight-thirty or so, and of course I'm wide awake at 5 a.m. this morning, and at work by 7. Yuck.

Please pray for D and her 18 month old daughter C... and that S will come to his senses and change his mind about walking away from his wife and daughter.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Chasin' My Own Tail

I'm sorry I have been remiss in updating. I have a lot to post on, but no time to put it together in my head. There was the Candidates' Presentation this past weekend, my 6th graders' Confirmation, the office I work in is moving (what joy that is) this week, and I'm heading to Yuma tomorrow.

So tired... be back later.

Monday, April 16, 2007

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR PAPA!!!

Today is Pope Benedict's 80th birthday.

From CNA :
"'The Church both in Rome in the other parts of the world is invited to join the Holy Father, Benedict XVI, to raise to God our Father a deep prayer of thanks for his 80th birthday and the second anniversary of his appointment,' the Vatican Press release reads."

And I have, and I do all the time.

Long Life and Health!!

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

The Right Thing To Say

Time: This Past Monday Morning
Place: Work
Who: Me and Boss
What: Answering phone

Me: "Good morning, law office."
Boss: "Well, good morning... He Is Risen!"
Me (with a smile on my face): "Indeed, He is Risen!"
Boss: "Oh my gosh, you're the only one who knows how to respond to that!"

Is it bad to be very proud of that accomplishment? Is that considered pride?

I wish everyone would greet everyone else this way first thing Monday morning.

*satisfied grin*

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Its Just My Blue Blue Mood*

I don't know quite how to say it, but I guess I'll just say it: I'm discouraged.

This weekend I was slated to present Chapter 5 of "Catch Me a Rainbow," the soft-cover (spiral) text used by many Fraternities for Formation. The title is "Listening to Scripture." I thought it a great topic to ruminate on in our usual round table way that we do things. There are great things to discuss in the first part of the chapter, especially in terms of asking, "How do you listen? What are your methods?"

I really liked the chapter because it has a subtopic on fundamentalism, and within that text in CMaRT I sensed subtle jabbing into those who observe the Tridentine rite. I wanted to explore that phenomenon within the Church, that movement that pushes for ecumenism with the non-Catholics, but refuses to be brotherly to those of our brethren--separated or not--who do prefer the Latin Mass.

Well, that didn't happen. See, our formation director... well, let me state for the record that her teaching methodology and her knowledge and background in terms of Franciscanism is second to none--she learned under Regis Armstrong, OFM Cap., that great Franciscan scholar. There is one other who recently transferred who has the same background, and we are so very blessed to have them. They make the Saturday formations and the ongoing formations wonderful and edifying.

That said, our formation director has this one little flaw: she is adamantly against anything that existed prior to Vatican II. If any of us bring up the Latin Mass in general conversation, she gets this wild look in her eye and a set to her jaw. I know she knows of my position in terms of my growing respect and understanding of the Latin Mass (I never have figured out how we went from there to here in terms of Liturgy, but that's beside the point). So, knowing she knows this, and sensing that she knows I know of her aversion to anything to do with the Tridentine era, she proceeds to hijack my chapter to vent about her peeves regarding all sorts of things with the 'fundamentalists' within our own faith.

For an example, she was going on about if a woman had uterine cancer, she had to ask her priest if it was within Church rules to have surgery, the conflict being that she had to be open to children. She often speaks of how demeaning the robes nuns were required to wear, and how they were to conduct themselves, and all their restrictions. These and other things were brought up, my chapter taken WAY out of context and I was given no opening to get it back on track. I was astounded at her vehemence--tolerance indeed!

Franciscanism is all about peace and joy... and demonizing the Tridentine Mass and those who prefer it?

I look at it this way in terms of my formation: it is the closest we have in this modern day to the Mass that Francis heard. It has not, and never has been, declared illegal; in fact, I was reading earlier this week that Papa Benedetto is moving closer to making the Latin Mass on a more equal footing with the Novus Ordo. After this weekend, I'm inclined to cheer the fact more than usual.

If I may digress...

The dawning of a new age that Vatican II was to open has instead gone awry: the overflow of lay participation they imagined has never materialized--every parish I've been in constantly scrambles to fill serving spots at Masses; vocations are down in most areas; attendance is down; scandals perforate the very fabric of faith; people do not know their faith. One of the things the formation director criticized was the memorizing of the Baltimore Catechism; my argument is that if it's Truth, what is wrong with memorizing it? It's not saying you can't further explore, but if you can't even get the facts out, how can you ever defend the Faith?

[a phenomenon I have observed out here in Phoenix is that the parishes that allow either the Tridentine Mass to be said or the Novus Ordo in Latin are extremely healthy parishes. St Thomas the Apostle on 24th Street in Phoenix and Corpus Christi in Ahwatukee come to mind, parishes that are happy and healthy and seem to have a greater number of seminarians compared to most]

All I remember of CCD was sitting in McCready Hall and singing "If the devil doesn't like it, he can sit on a tack--OUCH!" I remember coloring a lot. Nothing formative remained with me twenty years down the road. My catechism kids, though, are getting a much better grounding: they went to the Perpetual Adoration chapel last week; they have gone through a Seder meal; they know the difference between the Old Testament and the New (I barely did until I was in my twenties); they have picked saints from a broad range of choices for their Confirmation names with excellent reasoning in their essays, things of this nature. I quiz them from my copy of the Baltimore Catechism and they do pretty good--I didn't know and couldn't explain the answers when they were my age.

The times are a'changing... thank God.

But anyway...

We were given time in this session to discuss our May presentation. This has been a bit of a heartbreaker as well. I have a fellow Candidate who treats me as a leper (oh, the irony! and was one of those who nominated me for chair! gadzooks) because we didn't select the topic offered, and pretty much refused to participate; barely speaking to me isn't an answer either. Then the formation director steered our subject matter--not that the topic was bad (it's actually excellent), but it was the passivity with which it was accepted by the majority--and the minimization of the role of the priest we were hoping to have come to be our guest speaker really saddened me. I guess I'd better tell old Padrino not to bother.

So... in my state of mind by the time we dispersed on Saturday, I couldn't bear to attend Sunday's meeting. I was disillusioned and frustrated and disappointed. I know everyone at some point goes down this road when they're on this journey, the turn to that road prompted by individual things. And I know it will get better.

But for now, I'm in a blue mood.

~~

Two ironies in the past couple of weeks:

I ran across a beautiful San Damiano cross in a gift shop, gold paint on white resin in a pretty bas-relief; I don't usually buy things on impulse, but I did buy this and have Fr Alonso bless it for me. I didn't find it at the Franciscan parish, nor at the usual places: I found it at the gift shop of a Jesuit parish, St. Francis Xavier's Marian Shop on Central Avenue. Go figure.

Then the score today became Jesuits 2, Franciscans 0, when I opted to bypass the Franciscan parish. I can't bear to deal with leaving Mass angry at the showboating and the disrespect of people's work time (he made Ash Wednesday Mass almost two hours--people had some explaining to do, unfortunately) during work week by a particular priest. I couldn't chance it on the most holy of weeks. My boss later told me that Mass was said by Padrino, but it's a crap roll, and... no. No, I opted out of that, and took a different chance: I went to St. Francis Xavier today for Mass--and the third of Tony's Tuesdays (although I left my Novena stuff in my Christian Prayer book in the car). I don't know who the priest was, but it was beautiful, appropriate, orthodox, quiet and--get this!!!--thirty minutes even with the extra Gospel excerpts. There was no circus on the altar--mostly just Father doing what he needed to do to say Mass, not a Sacristan trotting across every five minutes, and things of that sort.

I am blessed to work for an attorney who frequents Mass during the week and who usually goes to Franciscan Parish, so now he knows what I mean when I return from there and say, "it ran long," with a roll of the eyes. On Ash Wednesday, the normally unflappable Boss was seething, and finally understood my frustrations.

Listen: I'm not one of those who advocate what my husband calls "drive through Masses"--I'm not a toe-tapper or a watch-watcher. But it's rude when it's a weekday Mass and it runs past, say, forty-five minutes. I'm all about GOOD music and appropriate liturgy, but if the Church wants people to continue to come to Mass during their lunch hour, they need to respect that time. Today I found that respect.

Thank you, Father Wonderful Jesuit (I don't know his name) for a beautiful Mass that I needed badly.

Yes, a Candidate for the SFO trumpeting the Jesuits! What is this world coming to? *chuckle*

~~

I leave you with this, from the Gospel of John from today's Mass:

My children, I will be with you only a little while longer. You will look
for me, and as I told the Jews, ‘Where I go you cannot come,’ so now I say it to
you.

Simon Peter said to him, "Master, where are you going?"

Jesus answered him,“Where I am going, you cannot follow me now, though you
will follow later.”

As sad as this passage is and to the sadness to which it leads, I can see the hope.

We will follow later.

_____________________
* Thank you, Mr. Orbison.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna to the Son of David

"Then the people cried out before Jesus, in whom they saw he who comes in the name of the Lord. In fact, the expression: 'He who comes in the name of the Lord,' had become the way to designate the Messiah. In Jesus they recognize him who truly comes in the name of the Lord and brings God's presence among them. This cry of hope of Israel, this acclamation to Jesus during his entry into Jerusalem, has with reason become in the Church the acclamation of him, in the Eucharist, who always comes among us in the name of the Lord, uniting the ends of the earth in the peace of God. Given that the Lord is coming, we come out of our exclusivist realities and become part of the great community of all who celebrate this holy sacrament. We enter into his kingdom of peace and acclaim in him, in a certain sense, our brothers and sisters, for whom he comes to create a kingdom of peace in this lacerated world. "

Benedict XVI, Palm Sunday 2006

Sunday, March 25, 2007

This and That

It was nice to read the Repulsive yesterday and find this... the local section has the High Fives section in which this blurb was posted. Fr. Hoorman's anniversary Mass and reception was awesome; what the article didn't mention was that the goal was topped by at least 30,000 cans by the time the party was started. My question is, why is it an "A-OK" instead of a "High Five"? I certainly think that this celebratory work of charity outranks the 70th anniversary of the Bashas' stores and the influx of flights to Williams Gateway airport, both of whom got high fives. I just don't understand.

Here's a HIGH FIVE to Fr. Hoorman, Corpus Christi Catholic church, and everyone who supported that drive.

~~

My good friends from California called this week, and AJ asked what should they do to get the baby (due in May) baptized. Because of their unorthodox schedules, it's been impossible for them to be able to go to RCIA classes over the last several years. I advised them to talk to the pastor of the local parish, explain the situation, and see what he says. The other problem is that even AJ--the most lapsed of Catholics--laments the whacked way that the LA Diocese is run by Mahony, and he is worried about the lack of orthodox teaching. He and I had a long talk about that. I'm so glad we have Bishop Olmsted--he's quietly and patiently weeding the garden in this Diocese.

~~

Speaking of California people, I found Mike's obit earlier this week. After the usual information, the last sentence read: "Mike was employed by the U.S. Forest Service for 29 years." I found it incredibly sad: his 52 years on this earth was marked by a single sentence.

It makes you think: how will you be remembered?

~~

We had two days of rain this past week after the temps the week before soared to 95, as I had posted before. Thank God it cooled down. I have been doing long overdue yardwork all weekend.

You'd never guess that I'd mowed the lawn a week ago...
~~

I was nominated in absentia to chair preparations for the presentation by the Candidates at May's meeting. I don't mind such things, but it does get frustrating when I say 'hey, let's get together, get some ideas on the table,' and I get laconic responses. Finally, thanks to the pushing of one of the other Candidates, we did have a meeting--lots of fun!--but only a portion of us showed. Since we're going by the "majority principle," we made executive decisions there. First option selected was to have a Friar come and talk, and in this instance it was decided to approach Fr. Alonso de Blas, OFM. I have a meeting with him on Tuesday, and we will go from there. I'm praying very hard that his calendar is free on that date so that everyone can listen to his funny and enlightening talks. If you cruise my postings, you know that I am an Alonso Groupie, and this would be quite the coup. "Padrino, por favor..."

In the event that he is unable to attend, we picked the topic of "Franciscan Life: What Does It Mean?" and it was agreed to turn it into a small group/roundtable discussion--everyone's idea of what the Franciscan Life is unique, and it's a subject that we all can learn from, as well as fostering discussion and getting to know each other better. I hope to also incorporate the several good suggestions emailed from a couple of the other Candidates. And, even if we get Fr. Alonso, I am going to ask him to speak on the topic from his perspective.

I'm praying for Fr. Alonso to be able to come and speak. It will be a meeting session to remember.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

A Day for the Irish and Then Some

Happy St. Patrick's Day! No, I'm not going to blather on about what he did and all that. I'm just glad I'm Irish--I don't have to wear green.

Have I ever told you that I make great corned beef and cabbage? My beef, carrots and potatoes came out phenomenally awesome. But... well, yeah... I kinda forgot the cabbage part... it's sitting in the fridge. What am I going to do with it?

Yes, I am a slacker.

No, it's not that I'm not paying attention, or haven't dreamed up posts. They're still sitting in draft form... on paper. And they're humdingers. And they're still in the trunk of my car with the bodies... er.... yeah.

It's already 95 degrees here in Phoenix. I mowed the lawn today and it was gorgeous, but by 11:30 it was time to head inside. WAY TOO EARLY--go away, high pressure system!

The Franciscan portion of this post will consist of the alert that Tony's Tuesdays--if one is observing the 13 week novena--starts this Tuesday, the 20th of March. So get thyself to Mass and go from there. There are several novena prayers... pick one, and have at it! Anthony is my best friend lately, because I have lost my mind. Help!

(yes, I suspect I was in the sun a bit too much today)

I would ask that you keep in your prayers two people: the first is Deacon Phil Simeone. He is doing much, much better but is still facing surgery. He and his wife are some of my very favorite people, and I wish him a continued, speedy recovery.

The second is someone who I haven't seen since December 10, 1997, at the Incident Command post for a rather graphic plane crash recovery in Lytle Creek Canyon, but who in succeeding years was never far from my affections, and was always on my short list of people I wanted to see again someday. This old pal is a fellow Irishman, so I figured that St Patrick's day would be appropriate to post about him.

Mike Fogarty died last week, former prevention officer on the San Bernardino National Forest, most recently in the aviation ops department, an aviation fan extraordinaire whose passion for helicopters was well known. While he wasn't popular with some folks (popularity being something he never gave two pins for), he was always extremely kind to me, and was always my "Brother Eurotrash." I can still see his swagger and clearly hear his smartassery in my mind's eye, that glimmer in his eye when he was particularly amused, and recall the many amicable chats we had and the good advice he gave me in my tour there on the Forest. It was Mike who brought me home from the burn ward back in 1995 in his patrol truck; he popped his head into the barracks to check on me while I was off duty and afterwards when I on light duty.

He died much too young, and his passing has greatly shocked me. I prayed for him at Mass on Wednesday, and it was then that hit me like a truck--gadzooks, who would have thought that Mike would be gone at such a young age? How tragic. My condolences go out to Mike's son and his family and friends.

It was a hard week for the Berdue last week: not only did they lose Fog, but also Charlie Stump and Larry Smith, the latter two after long illnesses. As was exclaimed to me last week, "What next?"